The Signs of Male Depression & Ways to Help

June is Men’s Health Month, a time to bring awareness to health issues that affect men disproportionately. Near the top of that list is depression.

According to the National Institute for Mental Health, 6 million men in America are affected by depression every year. In many cases it goes undiagnosed or unrecognized. All too often, the results are tragic. In 2021, American men died by suicide at a rate nearly 4 times higher than women. So, while males make up 50% of the population, they account for nearly 80% of all suicides.

One of the keys to reversing this trend is helping men overcome the reluctance to talk about their mental health and resist the urge to downplay their symptoms. In addition, friends, family members and co-workers need to understand that the ways in which men experience depression often differ from how it’s experienced by women. For example, men with depression may appear to be angry, irritable, or aggressive while women may seem sad or express sadness.

Other common depression symptoms that men may experience include:  

• Feeling anxious, restless, or “on edge”
• Physical issues including racing heart, tightness in the chest, recurring headaches, or digestive issues
• Loss of interest in work, family, or once-pleasurable activities and hobbies
• Inability to meet the responsibilities of work, caring for family, or other important activities
• Having thoughts of suicide

Reluctance to discuss the symptoms of depression often stems from stereotypes surrounding manliness and the stigma around mental health. It’s also possible that an individual may not even recognize his symptoms.

If you think someone has depression, you can lend support by simply beginning a conversation about how they’re doing. Try saying things like, “You seem really stressed lately. Is anything up?” Or “You seem tired these days. What’s wearing you down?” If they recognize physical symptoms, they may agree to seek help from their regular healthcare provider. This can be a good first step toward diagnosing and treating possible depression.

In any discussion you have, it’s important to remain open-minded and non-judgemental. Let them know that you’re open to hearing whatever they have to say and that you’re always available to listen.

If possible, encourage them to increase their level of physical activities and to be social. Invite them to events or other activities with you. Don’t push if they take a pass, but also don’t stop asking.

If they make any comments related to suicide—even as a joke—take it seriously. You may not be able to change their mind, but you can encourage them to talk and seek help by saying something like “I hate to hear you say things like that. I’m no expert but maybe you should talk to a professional about how you’re feeling. There’s no harm in seeing what they have to say. I’m happy to give you a ride or even come with you if you want.”

If you’re concerned someone is in crisis, dial 988 for the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at any hour of any day for help and guidance.

Trey Dobson, MD, is the chief medical officer at Southwestern Vermont Medical Center.